When we hear the word soulmate, we generally associate that with a loving partner. Dreams of finding a true soulmate and settling down together can dominate our heads and hearts. In reality, we may meet more than one soulmate, or we may meet none in this incarnation. We may also have soul families or soul connections, and travel through this incarnation learning, teaching and growing.

Regardless of how a soulmate appears, when they do, the chemistry and connection are undeniable; but sometimes the conditions are just not right for the couple to stay together. So, what happens when soulmates meet as loving partners, but one, or both are not ready or able to be together? Having experienced the incredible connection of a recognizable soulmate partner, I have also experienced the pain of letting him go, knowing for certain that I was not evolved enough at the time for the union to work.

From the very first time we met, we both felt an instant connection and such a deep feeling of familiarity. The familiarity and connection was in everything like intrinsic ties from the past. It was as though we had known each other since birth and grown up together. In fact, a past life regression had uncovered time spent together in a previous life as husband and wife with three children. So many similarities were evident from that past life to this real life. It was very easy to become lost in each other and the bliss of being reconnected masked some major challenges we faced in the relationship, at least for a while. As the relationship progressed, we continued to relish the fact that we were alike in so many ways. It was difficult at times to see where one ended and the other began.

And there lay the thread to our unravelling. Over time I began to see traits in this beautiful soulmate that unsettled me. They unsettled me because I realised they were a direct reflection of the same traits that lay within me, some that I had already left behind and some that caused me to see I could and should be a better person. I didn’t entirely like what I saw of myself. Looking at this other version of me in action day in day out, was enough to make me accept that I had to embrace change and growth. This beautiful soulmate had given me the greatest gift imaginable. Insight. Unfortunately, I knew the road on which I was headed was a solitary one and my dreams of sharing blue cheese and oysters with this divine soul while watching the sun set in our golden years would not eventuate this time around.

It was however to be the beginning of a wonderful journey of yet more self-discovery and further growth for me. I know none of it would have been possible had it not been for the incredible individual that graced my life, shone a light on areas that I needed to develop, and blessed me with his soulmate presence. I am profoundly grateful for the lessons I have learned from our connection.

In his book, Only Love is Real, Dr Brian Weiss writes of soulmates, “Sometimes soulmates decide not to get married while incarnated. They arrange to meet, to stay together until the agreed upon task is completed, and then to move on. Their agendas, their lesson plans for the entirety of this life, are different, and they do not want or need to spend all of this lifetime together. This is not tragedy, only a matter of learning. You may have eternal life together, but sometimes you may need to take separate classes.”