• A Jar Full of Fireflies
  • Sharon Spence
Sharon Spence   |   South Australia   

© 2015 - 2019 Sharon Spence.  All Rights Reserved

No More Loveless Sex

June 9, 2016

 

"The pain in my pelvis and hips is torturous. My entire sacral area is aching. I can feel my insides twisting and turning, my hips and legs bending and stretching in ways that make me want to curl up into a ball and scream. No more! No more! No more! Through the tears that are falling and the sobs that are coming thick and fast I decide right there and then NO MORE!

 

I see myself as a magnificent luminous being floating in the timeless abyss of space.  White light beams from my entire being and I stand tall in my own strength. Around me I see cords and chains. They are attached to my body and floating far off into the darkness. They vary in thickness, colour and texture. Thin gold threads to strong steel chains. I understand that they represent male energy. Male energy from those I have traded my body and soul to in this incarnation.  As I see this unfolding in front of me I am strong and resolute. There is to be no more of this. My hands move across the cords and chains as I sever each one.  Some chains are so strong and thick that in my mind's eye I see an acetylene torch cut through the metal until I am free at last.  I feel immediate release and freedom and I cry what feels like a million tears. tears for being so naive, tears of humiliation and now tears of joy for the awakening I have just experienced.

 

I decide in that instant that my body will never again be a haven for loveless sex, nor my soul a haven for loveless relationships. I call back my energies, pieces of me that I traded in a fruitless search for love, in a fruitless search for a sense of belonging. I know that I will never accommodate loveless sex or loveless relationships again.  I am a beautiful being of light, deserving of the purest love.

 

My energy healing session is complete and I have just experienced an incredible awakening and shift.  I now know freedom like never before."

 

I wrote these words immediately following a truly incredible session with my energy healer. I instantly felt like a bird being set free from a cage. During the session I realised just how much I had given of my body and soul throughout my life, either willingly, by force and manipulation or for survival. But no matter what the reason, I saw that I had permitted this to go on. I saw that I had subconsciously accepted this as my fate...and that was the line in the sand moment.  I had come too far to continue like this.  No more.  

 

The reality is, we all give of ourselves to procure something in return. It can be happening across all relationships in our lives including business relationships, friendships, family members and partners. We need to look closely at our relationships and examine whether we are trading any aspect of our self, and if so, we need to begin to ask  “what am I trading and why am I trading?”.  Living in this shadow side of the archetypal prostitute fosters unhealthy beliefs and actions. Piece by piece we can be torn apart on a soul level. We can be left asking ourselves why we feel devalued when we are living only as we know how. Our soul always knows why, even if we don't. We need to listen to those feelings, as it is our subconscious calling us to action.

 

When we deny ourselves a voice, or have our voice denied by others either passively or aggressively, we unfortunately set the standard by which we live. For some, try as they might, it can be all too easy to be manipulated into retracting any new found assertiveness and their soul screams on from within to be heard.  

 

It is important to examine our lives for this trend so we can put a stop to it and from there begin to set healthy boundaries that will serve and protect us on all levels. Power also comes from having the ability to say “no“ in a way that clearly defines our boundaries and calls for respect. Unfortunately for many of us, “no” is something we cannot easily say. No-one teaches us to set healthy boundaries in life. We may be fortunate to learn by positively observing them in action, but if not, we are left to stumble through and ultimately be left to face the consequences. 

 

Awareness is the key to breaking free from any cage that you find yourself held within. You have to call it as you see it and stop fighting your subconscious. In the words of Wayne Dyer, “When you feel compelled to use an excuse, become aware that you no longer need to. Simply become aware of this new awareness”. For only then can you experience the miracle of freedom on all levels and live a life filled with love of self. That is the life into which beautiful respectful relationships will flow.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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